A couple of weeks ago, Sue wrote about why it’s so hard to be a good people leader and why character and commitment matter more than strategy.
For my first Insight article with Leaps&Bounds, I wanted to write a piece to build on that idea from a different angle: what actually makes people feel that they matter at work, and why that’s harder than it sounds.
The connection between engagement and workplace culture is well recognized, even if it is not always well understood. In my work with organizations, I regularly hear leaders wrestle with choosing language that will guide behaviour to intentionally shape culture. Sometimes leadership teams debate words like belonging, thriving, and meaning, hoping that if they land on the right phrasing, the culture will follow.
The challenge is these words can feel abstract to leaders, and culture initiatives can lose momentum when people interpret these ideas differently. Most of us can recall a time when we did not feel valued at work, and we know exactly how different it feels when we do. When employees talk about not feeling valued, they often share specific disappointing experiences. Yet when they describe belonging or feeling valued, it is usually expressed as a feeling, and they are less able to point to the specific actions that created it.
The work of Zach Mercurio, author of The Power of Mattering, is practical and accessible. In his book, he outlines five key principles and offers specific behaviours leaders can practice to demonstrate that people matter simply because they are people, not only because of their performance. He explains that mattering is built in micro moments, not grand gestures, and that consistency is more important than the impact of any individual action.
His guidance is helpful but also unsurprising, which raises an important question. Why can it be so difficult to remember the importance of recognizing effort, not just outcomes, or to say something as simple as, “I am really glad you are on this team”? A leader operates within their own set of experiences and responsibilities, often juggling priorities that extend beyond their employees’ day to day accountabilities. Ensuring that others feel they matter requires cognitive empathy, also known as perspective taking. It means pausing and intentionally considering how someone else might be feeling in a specific moment.
Perspective taking is not easy. Most of us need deliberate practice to make it part of our daily behaviour. When we are tired, stressed, or overloaded, perspective taking decreases because it requires real mental effort to coordinate different areas of the brain. It asks us to slow down when everything around us feels urgent.
It is worth the effort.
Emotions are contagious in groups, and in high performing organizations, the effect can be especially strong because stress amplifies the ripple effect of emotion. Tension can spread quickly across a team, but encouragement can spread just as fast. When leaders intentionally create moments that help people feel that they matter, the impact can ripple outward, building positive emotion across the group.
There is also something powerful in this for the leader. Shawn Achor, in The Happiness Advantage, described research showing that one of the fastest ways for leaders to increase their own happiness is to deliberately make someone else feel better. Even in high stress situations, leaders experience greater happiness when they intentionally work to improve another person’s emotional state. He also explains that happiness extends beyond pleasure into meaning. Leaders who help others feel valued strengthen their own sense of purpose, which represents a deeper and more sustainable form of happiness.
When we think about culture, it is helpful to think less about programs or slogans and more about moments. The small choices to notice, to acknowledge, and to care may seem ordinary, but they do take deliberate action. And over time they shape the kind of leadership that truly makes a difference, and the type of workplace where people feel they matter, they belong, and that they want to contribute to.
